How to get my husband on my side    


One of the most common problems faced by couples these days is intimacy. When we talk about intimacy, it does not necessarily mean physical closeness, it means spending some time together, sharing feelings, a few cherished moments, and so on. However, with the increase in rat races, where every single soul is striving to survive, it does not happen often among couples. However, in this article, let us try to work out a few ways so that you get clarity about how to get my husband on my side.

How to get my husband on my side – Tips for trying to make it work

Aside from a workaholic life, the next big thing that prevents us from spending quality time is our phone. It is a huge distraction these days. And the same applies not just to the husbands but to the wives as well. They find the world in smart devices but not in their spouses!

However, there are ways out and this is what we will discuss in the paragraphs that follow.

Strategies for getting your husband on your side

Follow these strategies as these can help you get your husband closer to you. You may also add a few tips that come to your mind aside from the ones mentioned here. So, take a pen and make a note of the same.

You be the change you wish to see in your union

To start with, you can talk it out. Make him know how much you desire his attention, love, care, and caress. Do not get disappointed if he does not reciprocate. Mindset is important and it may be likely that he may not be in a proper frame of mind. So, have patience. Look for a good opportunity and share your feelings.

Turn your words into actions

Once you have made him known, how you wish he could be close to you, and if you find that it is still taking time, reinforce. Surprise your husband with a note and keep it in his lunchbox. Prepare his favorite food. There is an old saying that goes, ‘One way to get into someone’s heart is through the stomach’. As such, ask him what he would like to have for his lunch and make the same for him. This should meet your requirement of how to get my husband on my side, at least to some extent.

According to the principle of reciprocity, which is a social psychological concept, your kind actions are usually always reciprocated with kindness and a bonding that deepens and is understood well. It is an instinct, that the same actions will be returned in due time.

Plan a trip to his favorite place

It is not necessary to spend a fortune to have a good time with your closest. Plan a weekend with your husband and try to connect with your husband and relive those moments that you enjoyed before. Or perhaps, the moments that brought you closer to each other. These efforts foster engaged and attentive companionship. As goes a common saying that ‘actions speak louder than words’.

Try to be interesting

Have you ever noticed what interests your husband the most? Try to recall what is special about his best friend. Does he talk well? Is he light-hearted or has an excellent sense of humor? You can try to imbibe the same in yourself as well. Allow your light to shine. Be vibrant and make it look interesting. It essentially highlights your individuality and this gesture of yours is bound to captivate your better half.

Disagreements are a part of the equation

When you are living as husband and wife or as a partner, it is natural to have disputes and disagreements. And most importantly, it signifies a healthy relationship. However, it is equally important to set boundaries and make sure that you do not compromise with your self-respect.

In the event you have disagreements, respect each other’s views and try to understand what each one of you has to say. And if you find that both of you are not on the same platform, try to sort it out.

Weigh the pros and cons and try to work out a middle path that is agreeable to both. However, there must not be any arguments or unpleasantness. Remember, in times of crisis, if you can keep calm and work out a solution together, it only increases the closeness and bonding. You have the satisfaction that both of you have battled the hard times together. This is an instinct if you love each other.

Boost his self-esteem

Be proud of him and do so genuinely. It is a feeling that will come from within. Authentic feelings and emotions are visible and you can make out whether it is true or fake, whether you are pretending or your feelings are for real. Words of affirmation, compliments, and praise for his skills, and efforts, will only make the relationship grow deeper.

Never forget to express what he deserves. Remember, these small gestures can have a lot of positive impact on the emotional well-being of your husband. Try to get his attention by genuinely reflecting on his achievements and success. For a man, there is no better way to feel on top of the world than to get true words of appreciation and compliments from his lady love or better half.

Having known about a few ways to get my husband on my side, let us find out a few other aspects like-

  • Importance of communicating with your husband
  • Art of Persuasion
  • Realistic Tips on how to get my husband on my side
  • Common mistakes to avoid when trying to get my husband on my side
  • Signs that your husband is cheating

It is interesting to note that there is also a book available by the name How to Get My Husband on my side. A glimpse of the topics covered in the book has been discussed below. So, let us take a look at the same.

How to get my husband on my side – What does the book say

Take a look at the topics below.

Importance of communicating with your husband

We know that in any relationship, communication is key. It forms the backbone of any relationship. Unlike what most of us understand about communication, it essentially is a two-way process. It involves listening, understanding, and responding. The three factors form a part of a healthy relationship. Leaving out anyone will upset the equilibrium. As such, make sure the three steps are religiously done.

We have heard since time immemorial that honesty is the best policy. So, whenever you are having a conversation make sure that you convey your feelings honestly. The blame game is the last thing you can do. Blaming someone only worsens the matter. Without criticism speak openly and try to solve the matter. Communication is important and staying mum will only make matters worse.

Active listening is a crucial component of effective communication. Always stay engaged and interested in sound. Reflecting on his words is equally important to make him realize that you have paid heed to his words. If you have any doubts, clarify them same immediately.

It is not just one-sided but has to be from both ends. It is equally important to let your husband know about your desires and feelings. Express your emotions. If you do not approve of something, let him know why you disagree or why you think it may not work. By all means you can expect your husband to understand you just as you do. Respect for each other is vital. This ensures that your worries related to how to get my husband on my side.

Art of Persuasion

When you are trying to persuade your husband, remember not to manipulate. It is all about how you present your perspective and not compel. Convince without disregarding. Understand before you are understood. While convincing, use more of the word, “I” rather than “You”. For instance, you can say ‘I do not feel heard’ instead of accusing me that ‘you have no time to listen to me’. The selection of words can go a long way to maintaining a healthy relationship. It is not a tug-o-war situation, remember, both of you are not separate. It is more about improving the relationship rather than spoiling it.

Realistic Tips on how to get my husband on my side

These tips mentioned below must help you with how to get my husband on my side. These are as follows-

  • Try to foster a win-win situation – Your conversation must seem as if both of you are contributing to the betterment of the relationship instead of trying to impose each other’ views.
    • Stay positive – When you are trying to work on a relationship, there is no room for negativity. It acts as a barrier to good communication and also resolves any dispute if there is any. It will only make matters worse for your quest for how to get my husband on my side.
    • Appreciate- Expressing your gratitude is of prime importance. Thank him for his efforts and everything he does for you and your family. Appreciation and honest praise can lift a person and offer him gratification. And there is no better way to feel appreciated than being applauded for all your efforts. This is sure to bring him to your side. It will also solve the problem of how to get my husband on my side
    • Common mistakes to avoid when trying to get my husband on my side – You must have come across times when despite harbouring the best intentions, you end up being misunderstood. This can in turn jeopardise your equation with your husband. One of the mistakes that most of us make is to become aggressive. We tend to demand a lot despite getting enough. As a result, your husband tends to become defensive. Eventually, he will try to stop the conversation right away. This is a response mechanism.

Another mistake that is often committed among couples is to not give space for processing thoughts and responding. Not everyone has the same time frame and mechanism for processing their thoughts. It differs from one person to another.

Last but not least, do not assume things. Do not let false imaginations harm your marital harmony.

Signs that your husband is cheating

It is said that women have a strong intuition and when it comes to the matters of their husbands, they cannot be wrong most of the time. However, discovering that your husband is cheating can be heart-wrenching. This is a highly sensitive area and not approaching it properly can damage the marriage. A lack of patience can lead to a point of no return where there is no scope for any reconciliation. This can be very painful especially if you have kids to nurture together. Under such circumstances, the quest for how to get my husband on my side will be a far cry and beyond repair.

With the advent of technology, there are many ways you can confirm the same. However, not all women have the desire to do so and settle matters by talking. Here lies the challenge of effective communication and how you can handle the same.

Concluding the discussion on how to get my husband on my side, an important aspect that you must keep in mind is that not everyone has the same traits as others. And you are the best as you are. The person who loves you will accept you the way you are. It is also the same for your spouse. However, there are times when you have to realign your emotions for the person who is the love of your life.

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